Stay Alive
by HistoryTrash
Summary: Alexander thought bringing some sense into Charles Lee would be a good idea; he never knew it would be this stressful for him. (AKA Alexander's thoughts before, during, and after John's duel with Charles Lee.)
1. Before

**AN** : The story's rated T just because it has like, 2 swear words in the whole thing and the duel I guess is a little violent. This story is based on how the events of the Ten Duel Commandments play out and the order. The descriptions are based on the original cast. This is really my first story on here (I wouldn't say Wounded counts… It was a school project), and the first one completely based on Hamilton. The only thing I changed from the musical was that Lee's second was Evan Edwards, not Aaron Burr. There is next to no information on Major Edwards, so most things about him I just made up… If you know anything about him, send them to me! I would appreciate knowing more about anyone really!

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I have often been told that I am too irrational and every time I deny it. Though, this time around I'm afraid that I've succumbed to that label; and not only myself, but my dear friend John Laurens as well. I must say, it was folly on my part to call Lee out on his bluff, but I've had an itch on my tongue to blurt it out since Monmouth. I was sceptical about the man, but after the events in New Jersey, it's obvious. Now, it's as clear as day that the man is a traitor, but how is a great man such as Washington himself blind to the fact? I have tried to reason with him on multiple accounts, and besides the rare swearing he emits, he won't inflict any punishment on Lee himself.

John is a wonderful man, I am sure of it. We were quick to become friends when I arrived at camp, and he has stayed by my side ever since. Now we've formed an even closer bond since then. I rather enjoy his company along with the Marquis de Lafayette's, or Gilbert as he told me to call him. We've formed a jubilant trio; it's odd now that I think of it. Who would suspect a poor orphaned immigrant from the Caribbean, a wealthy South Carolinian abolitionist, and a high-spirited aristocrat French General to become friends? John has a nice sense of humour, all the while being respectful. He's intelligent as well—having studied law though he had a passion for science. I don't know he could've lived studying something he wasn't passionate about. How could he study something just because his father wanted him to? I could never do that; I would just argue until I could get what I wanted.

Gilbert still surprises me. When I heard an aristocrat French General was arriving at camp, I expected another elder, snobbish, and arrogant man. I was far from right; when Gilbert arrived at camp, he proved me wrong for once. When he arrived, he insisted on fighting without pay and would buy uniforms for other soldiers who couldn't afford. He was only 19 when he arrived, and not an image I held in my mind either. He was slim and was terribly tall standing around 5'10'', sadly much taller than I am. He sported his hair in a bun which went along nicely with his dark skin. We share similarities as well, which I definitely did not expect at first. We both were orphans at a young age (his father died at 2, and his mother at 12), and we both came from another country. He claims when he arrived he was over ranked as a major general, but I disagree. Anyone who acts the way he does and is as intelligent as he is deserves to be ranked as a major general. John is aiding me in my mission to bring Lee in his proper place; of course, he too has his disagreements with Lee. Gilbert is currently with Washington. He claims he has a morning meeting with the General, but I can see right through him. He loves the General far too much to go against his word.

I never thought that it would turn into a duel between the 2... It started out as a simple argument between John and Lee, but when Lee insulted Washington, John challenged him to a duel. I am, of course, John's second. While Lee called upon Major Evan Edwards, brother of Washington's surgeon Dr. Enoch Edwards. That's how I find myself somehow waiting in Philadelphia in the blistering cold on Christmas Eve.

Snowflakes fluttered down around me as Edwards, the medic, and I gathered around a large pine waiting for the two attendants to arrive. I nervously started to fidget with my fingers when I realised that this could end in death. This could end in the death of the man that I call my best friend and hold great admiration. My heart has swayed towards him, and I must confess; I find it adorable the way his fresh hazel eyes twinkle every time he laughs and his freckles dancing across his nose every time he smiles. How could I live knowing that he was forever gone from my life?

He isn't like any other man at camp with his attitude either. I must admit, I'm sure that John also knows of my romantic attractions towards him; On re-reading my letters to him, I must say that it's quite glaringly evident. I would act on it, but word spreads around quickly in camp, and how would they react to 2 men being romantically involved? I'm Washington's right-hand man, and he would surely remove me from that title. My thoughts were interrupted by said man rushing to our place with the heavy sound of panting filling the air.

"Apologies for being late. The reinforcements at camp were skittish in letting me leave so early at dawn, so I told them I was going to help new recruits." He said with a wink; his eyes started flitting around the landscape scanning to see if Lee arrived yet. His face formed into a sudden smirk when he realised Lee wasn't yet there.

"I see Lee isn't here yet! I bet he chickened out..." John announced smiling ear to ear. I sighed at his antics, but also silently hoped that Lee wouldn't arrive; if he didn't arrive, John would automatically be declared the winner of the duel, and no blood would be shed. A part of me wanted Lee to come just so John could teach him to stay in line, but if that resulted in a chance of John being injured, it was a risk neither of us wanted to take.

"He's coming!" Edwards interjected. "He's simply just... late." John kept a smug smile on his face as the sound of Edwards' boot tapping against the tree filled the air. From the corner of my eye, I saw the medic's eyes roll up and his mouth twist in annoyance. A fair reason as well; he was waiting for half an hour in the freezing cold with nothing but his uniform and a cloak. He launched an exasperated expression towards me. "Look, if the General doesn't arrive in the next 10 minutes I'm leaving. I'm sorry, you can even have your shillings back, but this is ridiculous." I opened my mouth to argue with him, but John cut me off before I was given the chance.

"Thank you, we fully understand."

What? As much as I like John, I sometimes cannot understand him. We paid the man to stay here in case anyone got injured. He can't simply walk out and call it off because he was too cold! I sighed; the duel would be called off in ten minutes anyways. It would be fine.

After a few minutes, the silence was broken by a scrawny figure with a mop of black hair sprinted to Edwards' side. Shit. Charles Lee was here.

Before he got a chance to speak, Edwards started to glare at Lee at shouted at him. "It's fifteen before 7 and you finally choose to arrive! We almost called the duel off! What the hell took you so long?" It was an awkward sight, the young soldier yelling at the older man.

Lee sheepishly glanced around before briefly answering, "I was feeding my dogs..." At this, me and John burst out laughing while Edwards looked at Lee in disbelief. Of course, what were we expecting? Lee is widely made fun of in camp for his attachment, rather obsession over dogs. He was never seen without a couple hounds at his feet. I'm surprised Lee didn't bring along a few to the duel! Just the fact that he would care so much about his dogs to be late for a duel is incredulous.

Lee frowned and tore his eyes from us and started making his way up a hill with his dark cloak swaying behind him. John's face swiftly washed with earnestness and took Lee walking up to the site of the duel as a cue to follow. I trailed behind him along with the medic as Edwards ran over to Lee talking to him. I ran over to Laurens' side as well, leaving the medic hiking up behind us. John turned his head to look at me, the cold breeze lightly blowing his curly dark brown hair.

"Do you think Washington will approve of this, Alex?" He nervously asked me. John was loyal, but he wouldn't do something against the General's orders. I shrugged my shoulders.

"I mean, he never said directly not to get into a duel. And besides, he wouldn't let _me_ do anything to him, not _you_." John looked at me incredulously.

"You and I both know what he means, Alex. When he knows that I got into a duel, and you're my second… never mind." He stopped mid-sentence shaking his head. "Everything will be alright." He shoved his hand in his pocket searching for something. His hand emerged holding a folded sheet of paper held together with a crimson wax seal. "Here. If I don't make it… Give this to Martha, okay? You know what she looks like, I have a picture of her beside my cot."

I gently took the sheet from his hand and tucked it delicately into my coat pocket. John didn't talk about his wife a lot, but I knew he had one. A one which he dearly loved and had a child with. I understood his adoration towards his wife; I too had my marvelous Eliza, which I loved to the moon and back.

I broke the silence between us once again by giving him a piece of advice that had been lingering in my mind since he agreed to the duel. "John, whatever you do, do not throw away your shot." When John heard this, he laughed and punched my arm.

"Of course not! I'm dying to teach Lee a lesson after all."

I glanced ahead at the 2 men in front of us and they were playing out the same thing. Lee handed Edwards a note, most likely to his siblings, as he never wed and his parents were deceased. Nobody at camp would tease him at camp for this; even I knew which line to not cross.

At the top of the hill, Lee and John scanned for an area to duel. If the area wasn't dry enough, the bullet wouldn't go off properly. At least to me, this must've been a damn hard job to find a dry spot in the middle of winter. I glimpsed at the medic wandering around the terrain looking for a place to stand when the duel commenced. He finally settled for the trunk of a tree a well enough distance away from us. At least he could have deniability after the duel; good for him.

"Here!" Edwards abruptly shouted. Lee, Laurens, and I made our way towards the area Edwards was pointing at. It was a spot with a few tufts of grass sticking out of the snow. John knelt and felt the ground.

"Still wet, but this is the best we're getting."

Edwards shook his head and waved his arms to get our attention. "Okay, enough say whatever you need to say, then let's get started." I saw John's head droop down, his eyes shut in a prayer. I always knew he was a religious man; beside the picture of Martha near his cot, he also had a small bible in a brown leather binding. I myself was never quite a religious person. I never went to church quite often before when I had the chance or sat down and read my copy thoroughly. I've tried to get into the habit of praying at night ever since I married Eliza, as she did so every night.

As Lee and John were mumbling their prayers, I took this as a chance to try to compromise with Edwards. Maybe we could stop this duel from happening… Me and Edwards were never particularly close, but I knew he didn't believe violence was the answer to everything. He knew I didn't like Lee, so this could end either well or horribly. I slowly approached Edwards planning what I was going to say.

"Major Edwards," I greeted.

"Colonel Hamilton," He responded smoothly. "Can we agree that duels are dumb and immature?" I shrugged my shoulders at this.

"Sure, but your man has to answer for his words, Edwards." I shot back at him.

"With his life?" He asked. "You and I both know that's absurd, sir." I felt my anger boil inside me. Lee was the reason men died in confusion… Lee was the reason we didn't have the chance to win the battle and take Philadelphia! Lee bad-mouthed Washington!

"Hold on, how many men died because Lee was inexperienced and ruinous?" I glared at him, slightly raising my voice.

"Okay, so we're doing this," Edwards said rolling his eyes, walking away. I felt like killing myself after I spewed those words out of my mouth. I'm an idiot! I had a chance to negotiate with Edwards, to end this duel, and I just ruined my chance.


	2. During - Part 1

**AN:** Sorry this chapter is short, I've been trying to improve my drawing skills... I'm glad some of you actually like my story! I imagine part 2 would be done in the first or second week of August.

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Edwards shouted to get our attention, "Okay, enough let's get started. Take your pistols." He waved 2 duelling pistols in the faces of each man. My heart stopped. The duel was commencing. John's back cambered as he perked up as the sight of a gun being waved in his face. I would be lying if I were to say I didn't panic; my heart raced as I thought of something to say to John before he went. I watched as John nervously grabbed the gun being shoved in his face by the older man. My eyes widened as he took a step forward, his small digits fiddling with the gun. My hand suddenly shot out and grasped his shoulder, effectively making him stumble backwards. He turned his head and stared at me, his eyes shining with anticipation. I bit my lip as his head tilted in inquiry waiting for me to speak.

My heart grew heavy as I leaned forward towards his ear and whispered into his ear, "John please, just stay alive." That was it. 5 words. I pushed him forward, turning him around before I could see his face. I knew if I were to look at his face, I would burst out into tears. This could possibly be the last time John saw me; I didn't want him to see me sad for the last time. My mind wandered into weighing the odds of if had I kissed him… no. He showed no signs of liking me as far as I could see, and if he survived this ordeal, he would question me about it. He would probably think I was disgusting… I have to stop.

 _John is your best friend and only your friend. He has a wife and you have a wife._ _ **He doesn't love you and will never love you.  
**_  
I needed to drill that into my brain. I turned back to the scene and saw Lee walking up to the duelling ground. He tried to wear a confident expression on his face, but his eyes shone with fear. His legs were almost shaking as he stood back to back with John, his bronze duelling pistol close to his chest, the muzzle pointing towards the sky. They switched positions, their feet shuffling around each other's, backs still turned so Lee would be facing Edwards and John would be facing towards me. I gazed at John in the eye; the sight that approached me almost made me choke. His usual cheery hazel eyes were now tainted with fear and his face so innocent. He sounded so confident before, that he was going to win, but now he was wracked with the fear that he might possibly lose the duel. He looked at me helplessly for help, but I knew I couldn't do anything to help him. He was too far into the duel now to stop. I simply tried to hold back my tears and smiled at him, hoping that it would give him some encouragement. He ripped his eyes away with his knuckles turning white from gripping impossibly hard on the brown handle.

Edwards had a blank expression on his face; either from not caring or caring  
too much. It was impossible to tell with that man. His and Lee's friendship has always been strange. Lee was considerably older than Edwards- about ten years I think- and has been on  
Washington's staff since the Revolution started (possibly why Washington refused to give punishment). They were opposites in physical appearance as well.  
Lee had short raven hair combed to one side rather than the traditional hair tied back in a queue. He had dark brown eyes and a long nose. He wasn't too scrawny in my opinion, just slim, but just went with the rest of the camp. He was smart, I'll admit, but he was too stubborn and had bad anger issues. Edwards was the exact opposite. He has his blond hair tied back in a queue with sharp calculating grey eyes. He also had a long nose like Lee, but his was slightly more upturned, giving him a french look, though he was British. He was slightly chubby, but was far better at maintaining his anger than Lee was; he was usually calm and relaxed. I didn't know any other personality trait to Edward's than that because he was usually _too_ quiet.

"Ready!" Edwards shouted. Wait no, no, no! This was all happening too quickly. What if Laurens-

"Ten Paces!" This had to stop. Laurens couldn't die! I- I couldn't do anything. I watched through tear brimmed eyes as Lee and John made their steps away from each other.

"And Fire!" Lee shouted. The two men then spun around pointing their weapons at each other as 2 deafening gunshots filled the air.


End file.
